Life...

Wow is life crazy.  Just when you think things are going good, BAM...you get a smack in the face.  My mom has always told me, when you are on the right path, things may be rough but you can handle them...when you drift from that path, things are much harder to deal with.  Now maybe your path is family or work, my path has been God and Family.  I have drifted and come back numerous times as I believe most people have.  Am I perfect? NO! Do I always do what God instructs us to do?  NO! Do I love God? YES!  Do I think God doesn't give us more than we can handle?  Sometimes I question this. 

For 13 months and 23 days, life has been hard for me.  Getting up everyday, working, being mom, being wife.  It has been hard and I have had some set backs in my life I never thought I would deal with.  I have gained 42 lbs in 1 year...42!!!!!  Some people cope by not eating, working out, smoking...nope, not me.  I eat.  Starting in January, I decided to get my life back.  I needed to put myself higher up on the "chain" or I would never be truly happy again.  So working out began, I have been pretty good but had my down days.  Eating has always been the downfall (especially McDonald's Breakfast).  Dieting, not so good at unless there is a meal prepared for me.  When graduating from college I wanted to drop a few pounds and went on Seattle Sutton.  That would be great but can't really justify spending $125 a week on food when we are working on paying off bills! BTW...Down 7.4 lbs!
:-)

There are a few reason why, besides myself I wish to get into shape.  Yes, make myself feel better but others are...
- getting "older"
- Dusty
- wish for another baby

I know Dusty will love me whatever I may look like, but I also wish to feel good about how I look.  Another baby, may downgrade the pain I currently have....Do I think another baby will replace Kellan, not at all, but I think there is a hole that needs to be filled.  The other question came to mind about what if I can't HAVE another baby?  I am completely open to adoption and probably would like siblings if they were available!  My sisters were adopted from China and I love them completely!  Would it be a change, of course, just like any change in our lives. 

I have also learned, that other things in my life that have changed, may not have been about me.  There are more things going on in the world and people living in their own personal hells that we don't know about.  Do I wish I could fix problems, yes, but when I can't fix myself, how am I suppose to help others?  Church...that is my solution!  I went this past Sunday after missing 3 weeks and let me tell you, God smacked Dusty and myself!  We are now going to do what we can.  B.L.E.S.S.

People think of the following verse as a sad verse, but it is actually completely opposite!  It is showing we always have a friend beside us.
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. "

Psalm 23:4